Mr. Yoon
Basic Info Richard “Dick” Yoon is a recurring figure in the Penthouse. He is not an actual user, although he is idolized by a small handful of users, most notably Benny, Jim Pickens, and Hugh Neutron. Backstory Original Body Mr. Yoon is an entity that was the third thing ever created, right after light and honey nut cheerio's. Not only was he Adam, but he was also Ghangis Khan, as history got their names wrong. His original body died on April 17th, 1887. As a free sprit Mr Yoon spent a small part of his life as a bodiless spirit. He mainly was just straight chillin'. Not much important events occur here. Current Form and life Mr. Yoon's current body is an Asian Chad, created from successful government experiment that was meant to perfectly teach Engrish. He was created because of the escape of their bio-nuclear hybrid weapon, Toast.mp4. Currently, he is Benny’s Engrish teacher, which explains why Benny has been bombarded with Engrish homework. Mr. Yoon is also bad at math, so to compensate for his lack of skills in the field of arithmetic, he takes up in educating others about Engrish. In his free time, Mr. Yoon shops at Trader Joe’s and enjoys cuisine from PetSmart. Mr. Yoon might be racist and on substances. Benny states that Mr. Yoon mocks other Asians and Benny seems to vaguely recall that Mr. Yoon once said the N-word. It is uncertain whether Mr. Yoon does or does not have the N-word pass. As for substances, Benny claims that Mr. Yoon may occasionally be on marijuana. It is also speculated that Mr. Yoon has once entered and escaped from a rape camp disguised as a Mormon camp. It is also speculated that Mr. Yoon has escaped a government facility.Mr. Yoon has seven Yoonlings, two of which have been confirmed to be directly related to him. Yoonisms Yoonisms are people and things commonly associated with Mr. Yoon. Yoonisms include: * Keys * Staplers * Wallets * Sweatshirts * Tissues * Books * Urine * Mormons * Yoon Coins * 1958 Ford Edsel sedans (Yoonmobiles) Quotes Quotes by Mr. Yoon himself: * “KEYS!” * “Alright, alright, alright.” * “Book.” * “Catcher in the Rye.” * “Why you have B? Why you no A?” * “He took his virginity, guys!” * “Take her virginity!” * “Move your seats. Don’t make them close enough so that you can jack each other off.” * “Stop jacking each other off!” * “WHAT THE FREAKING SUGAR SNAP?! Quotes relating to Yoon * “Yoon Goon” -Ridley and HoonGoon * “Who is Mr. Yoon” -nojo and Regaga * “Mr. Yoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooon” -Jim_Pickens and •Tyzias• * “Mr. Yoon Gang represent” -BarrelOregon1 * “Hi Mr. Yoon” -IQ * “Mr. Yoon my n-word” -DummkopfRomance * “$Yoon$” -Paladin_Leeroy * “There’s a taglist for Mr. Yoon now?”-•Christine• * “Oh my God! I’d totally buy a sweatshirt from that sexy bitch!” -Sausagelawyer * “Hmm... Hugh, I’m trying to sneak around, but I’m DUMMY THICC, and the clap of my ass cheeks keeps alerting Mr. Yoon.” -Benny * “BUY YOON SWEATSHIRT. 300 DORRA VALUE. BUY NOW. HIGH QUALITY. ONLY 5 DORRA” -Benny * “Mr. Yoon doesn’t have hair. He only has a bowl. Da green top” -Benny * “Mr. Yoon got da green top” -Benny * “Mr. Yoon called us stoners once. I think he does weed low-key. I smelled smoke in his class once. But whatever. I don’t judge.”-Benny * "You know, I got to know Mr. Yoon in the near 1950's, before Benny arrived. But his marijuana addiction has gotten him into a downward spiral." -REDACTED Commandments of Yoon I.Thou shall not covet another’s paper without suffering the wrath of Yoon. II: Thou shall not jack each other off while in the presence of Yoon. III-X: remaining eight commandments have yet to be revealed.(edited) Mr. Yoon and The Soviet Union. One day while Mr. Yoon possessed the body of a random Russian man jacking off, Mr. Yoon's weird motions and overall power made this man have a revelation: "What if I start the Soviet Union?" So here is the fax: Mr. Yoon accidentally started The Soviet Union. Mr. Yoon's influence can be seen with the ideology of The Soviets. Mr. Yoon, despite having a religion based on him, is a cold atheist, he believed in Internment camps, and his hatred for The South Vietnamese definiealy carried over. But as Mr. Yoon changed an evolved as a person, his ideas changed. Using 2% of his epic points, he ended the Soviet Union in 1999. Trivia * Mr. Yoon created a duo of games called "Mr. Yoon's Holocaust Adventure." We only have documents of the sequel, as Mr. Yoon hated the first game so much, that he destroyed all copies and killed all developers. Only the sequel remains, but only 7 copies are known to exist. The game is a platform RPG and is about Mr. Yoon liberating Concentration Camps. Mr. Yoon throughout the game informs the player of the treachery of The Holocaust, and in the game's conclusions, explains in great detail, why you (the player) should not purchase Grape Nuts. * Mr. Yoon is epic. * Mr. Yoon may have a vore fetish. This, however, cannot be confirmed due to each person who due to testify this claim has been pronounced deceased by cause of digestion. Category:God